crazy boy

So here's a funny story...(or a little foreboding - is that the right word?)...
Brian gets off the bus the other day with a mob of 20 neighbor kids. Three kindergarten girly girls, along with their concerned siblings, all come running up to me, "Brian twisted her arm. Yeah, and he he hit me on the head. He messed up my hair! Well he tried to kiss me! Me too, me too!" They all just stood there looking at me, wondering what I was going to do to him. I was wondering what I was going to do, too.
Brian can't lie worth a darn (he gets this funny look on his face and I bust him every time). So when he looked at me straight in the face and said "I did not try to kiss them!!!" without flinching, I wanted to believe him. But how could I when there were 20 witnesses staring me in the face? After he spent an hour (maybe more) in his room so I could think, I finally dragged the story out of him. The three girls were sitting in the seat behind him. They decided it would be fun to tease him, so they started patting him on the head and kicking his feet over and over and over again. The twisted arm makes sense now, huh? And the kissing part? Well, after I asked him why he lied, he said, "I didn't lie, Mom. I wasn't TRYING to kiss them. I was PRETENDING to kiss them so they would leave me alone."

What am I going to do with that boy?